Is it Time?

April 13th, 2012

Is it Time?

I believe that the key to our experiencing “growing younger” is to create significantly change your life. We all have experienced being in that place of comfort, predictability, and yes, maybe even boredom. We have tried to convince ourselves that we were happy. And, for a time we might have actually believed that to be true.

I contend that when we allow ourselves to get to that place of comfort in our lives and then fight to stay comfortable that we are really about giving into “growing old.” We need to buckle up and leave that place…fast!!!

I believe that we should intentionally force a significant change into our lives each year. I believe that in order to live young mentally and physically we need to absorb our time and our minds with something other than our comfortable selves.

So where are you in 2012? Do you have a major life and/or career challenge on your plate this year?

• Is it time to build that new home even in tough economic times?

• Is it time to change your job even when it’s safer to stay employed?

• Is it time to have your child even with a hostile world’s unknown variables?

• Is it time to volunteer with that organization that will force you to change your weekly schedules and to visit places that make you uncomfortable?

• Is it time to go back to school and get that degree or certificate even if the prospect/s of turning the tuition money into additional spendable income are unclear?

• Is it time to learn for the sake of learning?

• Is it time to run that marathon or climb that mountain, or hike that trail?

Hey you…Is it time to restart living your life? Is it time to think and grow younger?

Is it time?

2012: A Lenten Meditation

January 30th, 2012

2012: A Lenten Meditation

Verse Friday, March 23: 1 Corinthians 13:3 If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing

An older gentleman looked at his friend and said, “You know, the pros on the Seniors Golf Tour don’t “cuss” “as much as the young guys on the PGA Tour.”

His friend replied, “That’s because they are a lot closer to meeting the Guy who doesn’t like the “cussing!”

Over time…Trust me…We really do change!

I’ve always enjoyed the process of developing detailed annual performance plans for myself and my business. Lately I’ve been surprised at the evolution of my plans in terms of their focus and simplicity.

Note my 2012 Annual Plan:

• To focus on my “faith walk” and “faith family”…
• To focus on my times with Susie and our children…
• To focus on the “now” each day and to let my yesterday pass away…

Loving life is in…Driven accomplishment is out. I’m surprisingly trusting in God to add more details.

And…I’m doing a lot less “cussing!”

Paul Bruno

Living in the Now

December 23rd, 2011

Living in the Now

It was early November and I got the call. “Paul are you sitting down?” asked my doctor. The results of the scan are in…The numbers aren’t good. I want you to take a nuclear stress test. After some moments of disbelief, denial, and downright fear we set a date for later in the month.

In retrospect, the decision to wait became the main reason for this blog entry.

You see, I had to discipline myself to stay focused on my work and my clients and not give into my worry. I had to re-learn a childhood ability to focus on “the now” and to not give into focusing on the future possibilities which were far from compelling.

During the process I drew on the wisdom of Dale Carnegie and his book, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. I would like to share 3 of his recommendations with you that especially helped me during this period:

“Live each day in “Day Tight Compartments”…Don’t worry about yesterday. Don’t worry about tomorrow. Focus on living well and living well today. As a matter of fact you can break this line of thought down to living this hour, this minute, and this moment to the fullest.

“Cooperate with the inevitable.” You inevitable is going to happen. So, reorient your focus to what you are doing or can be doing today. The best way to prepare for your inevitable is to live in the moment and the purpose for today.

“Don’t try to saw sawdust.” Stop revisiting your short comings; your failures; and/or your grudges. Let them go…Let them all go. You’re letting your past sap the positive and optimistic energies from your present. You are ruining the quality of your life today. And, this will diminish the quality of your life and your possibilities tomorrow.

Now, take a deep breath and close your eyes…relax your shoulders…Deep inside, you know that there is a different you. Why don’t you go there for awhile and be reunited with the good that has blessed your life. Go visit the places; the people; and the happenings that have brought a smile to your heart. And, since it’s that time of year, why don’t you decide to stay a little longer.

Living in the now brings you to your present. Living well in your present is your best preparation for your future. And, the results from the stress test are in…My present is gratitude…

I hope that you and your loved ones enjoy a relaxing, a fulfilling, and a gracious holiday season.

Adding New “Words” to My Page

October 1st, 2011

I recently completed a volunteer weekend in a state penitentiary and, in one of my conversations with a “resident,” I was offered up this little pearl of wisdom.

I asked Robert, “Robert, what are you learning from our time together?” “What are you taking away from this weekend? Without hesitation Robert responded,

“I’m adding new words to my page” …
“Do you hear what I saying?”…Do you know what I mean?”

My reply was, “Yes, I hear what you’re saying but I don’t know what you mean…” And, here is how Robert explained his response…

“When you’re a child and your Mama tells you to put a dime in the Sunday collection plate…You’re a CONTRIBUTOR”…

“When you go off to high school and someone asks you for a dollar to fight a disease…You’re a DONER”…

“When you go to college and someone asks you to write a check to support the institution…You’re a PHILANTHROPIST!

“Now, do you know what I mean?”

My reply to Robert was, “Yes Robert I now know what you mean…And, thank you.”

What are the new words that are being added to your page?

What are the new words coming from other people; from your life’s experiences; from your reactions, actions, and decisions? Are they good or bad words? What are they telling you about yourself?

Do you need to find some new words? Do you need to find new people and new experiences?

“Do you hear what I saying?”…Do you know what I mean?”

“I am my own best me!”

August 31st, 2011

“I am my own best me!”

I am continually amazed how easily I can be persuaded that I am, somehow, lacking as a person. It has come to mind that we are living in a pervasive environment that strives to convince us that we need to acquire that ultimate resource to ensure we will find a more significant life. Think about how often you find yourself being consumed by someone else’s opinions and/or judgments. In the end, we are resigned to a belief that life is “too big” for us to handle on our own.

Do any of these statements touch a respondent chord?

If so, here is an approach to consider…Some years ago, I discovered the power of reciting positive affirmations. And, I developed a personal mantra that “comes in handy” when I sense that I am slipping down a precarious path that ends in worry and self doubt. Here is a version of that “pick-me-up” for you to ponder:

“I really like and respect myself…I am my own best me…I am the best  Paul Bruno that I can be…I am a positive loving person and I enjoy catching myself and others in the acts of doing things right…I enjoy building up positive feelings of self confidence and self esteem…It seems that really good people are attracted to me…

But most importantly…I am attracted to me!”

I wish that I would discipline myself to take the time to recite these words every day. They seem to “come and go” in concert with the swirl of events on my calendar. However, I know that when I’m at the top of my game, I start the day reciting a spontaneous version of this mantra during my “wake up” process.

Now, as a result of reading this blog, my hope is that you will pause; listen to what you are currently telling “yourself about yourself;” and develop your own positive affirmation. My hope is that you will develop your ability to shape a “more confident way of being.” My hope is that you will begin to hear yourself saying and believing and feeling:

“I am my own best me!”

Time is of Your Essence

July 15th, 2011

I am convinced that we have way too much time on our hands. We have forgotten how to take charge of our time and make the time to do things that define the quality of our lives. In short, there are more than “enough hours in the day.”

How many people asked you for “30 seconds” of your time today only to lock you up for at least 30 minutes? How many meetings did you feel compelled to attend because you wanted to be “in the know?” How many times did you visit your e-mail; your Linkedin account; your Facebook page; your twitter account etc.? Did you skip a meal today because you felt that you were “getting backed up?” Are you going to leave the day exhausted and with this nagging feeling that, though you were frenetically busy, you really don’t have much to show for your efforts?

Think back…When did you work on something that was really important to you, your family, your job; or your career? When did you break away and exercise? When was the last time that you noticed the warmth of the sun or the crisp air of a fall morning? When did you last see and smell the ocean or enjoy a view of a real mountain landscape that was not an electronic image? What does that inner voice tell you…about you…during the day? Do you feel optimistic or resigned?…Joyful or sad?…Grateful or bitter?…Alert or distracted?

We have that “essence” time embedded in everyday. We’ve chosen to let other people, events, and “digital gadgetry” lay claim to our time…We let other sources define our priorities and those priorities often do not include ourselves. We have forgotten how to live our own lives to their fullest…We have given up on our idealism, optimism, and our dreams!

It’s time to reconnect with people, places, and ideas that matters most to you? What used to excite you about you and your potential? And, when are you going to start making…no taking the time to work on something that connects you…to you? We all have that choice each day…that moment of truth. And, all too often, we step back from living and fold back to our comfortable distractions.

Hey YOU…Yes YOU…It’s time to get serious about you. You must reclaim and reinvest time each day to work on becoming the person that you know is in there. When I think about the downside of this proposition, I really don’t have a choice here. And neither do you!

A day is a long time…And, inside those hours there is time that reserved and waiting for you. Take heart…You still have the time to reclaim your life…to reclaim your essence…to become what you want to be…and who you want to be…DO IT!!!

Paul Bruno, President, REFocus, Inc.

Managing to Win

June 11th, 2011

“Managing to Win”

In 1994, the founding of REFocus, Inc. was based on this set of guiding principles:

• We believe that if you want to create and sustain a successful organization, you need to start by matching the right employees to the right jobs…

• We believe that a defining difference between organizations will be found in the integrity of the working relationships between employees and their managers…

• We believe that you must connect each employee to the company’s performance objectives by setting annual performance goals with each employee…

• We believe that all managers need to audit performance and routinely discuss how their employees achieve their targeted results…

• We believe that leaders are responsible for ensuring that timely, accurate, and appropriate recognition is given to all employees…

• Finally, we believe that if you want to retain your top performers you must create opportunities for them to develop new knowledge and skills; encourage them to compete for new job opportunities; and release them when their time arrives.

Living in Gratitude

June 7th, 2011

Living in Gratitude

I believe that each of us needs to embark on an intentional quest that leads to discovering what is going right in our lives. I believe that we are in danger of missing “our moment” because we are focusing on “our future”…and, what we consider to be lacking in our present.

I believe that some of us may be missing our lives. I believe that we are forgetting to search for what isn’t lacking in our lives. I believe that we need to refocus and then use two words from our distant past that open new options; that focus on the positive in the moment; that re-connect us to each other…

Thank You!

Thank you…two words that capture the moment. Thank you…two words that guide us to our feelings about the moment. Thank you…two words that connect us to someone who is responsible for bringing us to the moment.

In other words, we stop; we acknowledge; and then we honor the gift and the source of that gift that has enriched our lives.

Spirited Entrepreneurs in Transition Must ReFocus

September 23rd, 2010
Are you a in a transition? Do you need to improve your performance? Paul Bruno, President of ReFocus Inc. and a Charlotte Christian Chamber Coach will share his top tips to find God at Work in Our Work, Creating your Own Stimulus Package, and Career Pathing. Paul is a consultant, author and coach with incredible experiences working with over 7000 individuals inside of companies like Walt Disney Corporation, Lockheed Martin, and Rollins College. Paul brings a Spirited approach to his coaching business and wants to share his wisdom with us. Find out how to zero in on the behaviors, beliefs, and the bottom-line to-do’s to easily transition to a higher level of performance.

The Lost Art of Noodeling: It’s Called Living Life

July 29th, 2010

“Just trust yourself…Then you will know how to live”

-Goethe

In any life transition we all reach a point when we realize that, “more of the same is no longer my best option.” We come to realize that we’ve been “noodeling” with some other ideas and/or approaches but, in the end, we have been coming back to what feels to be more predictable and safe. And, we decide to “stay in place” and, sometimes, even resign ourselves to being miserable.

In fact, this experimental “breaking out” process is extremely important. We are teaching ourselves what we don’t want to do…what doesn’t work for us. And, that is a critically important step. We are learning through personal experience. And, what a powerful way to learn!

I recommend that instead of looking for ways to circumvent the process that we embrace proactively acquiring our life’s experiences. Experimenting with new options shouldn’t be a perfect science. Additionally, exploring new venues doesn’t have to be a personally combative, judgmental, and worrisome process that leaves you feeling inadequate and “down” on yourself.

There is great power in realizing if something isn’t working for you…then you can simply change your mind and you’re your approach.

Someone recently said to me, “Paul what you call noodeling is what I call living my life!”

So…

“Just trust yourself…Then you will know how to live!”